Dear Gracious Host,

          It is with extraordinary pleasure that I reveal delightful news onto you.  For I, John, formally accept your invitation to the elegant consumption gathering you have been so generous to invite me to.

          As per your mass Facebook invitation, I will acquire various forms of alcoholic beverages and kindly contribute to this communion.  My bones quiver with excitement at the thought of littering my organs with toxic material so I may partake upon various conversations and actions I would otherwise be too reserved for.  May the inhibition for this gathering be high, and the boredom of everyday life be eradicated!

Should the need arise between today’s date, and the beginning of this exceptional gathering for other nutrients or resources that are not specified in the description above, alert me and I will take it upon myself to gather what I can before I commandeer transport.  In addition, should other contributors wish to gather beforehand, kindly send me a note, and I will relay my approximate geographic coordinates so we may engage in invigorating pre consumption activities, then travel to this incredible event in large quantity.

I look forward to my own, as well as my fellow inebriated colleagues’, irresponsible actions followed by a day of recovery and regrets.  The tall tales that will accompany this adventure will be told throughout the land for weeks and months to come.  Allow the heroes of inebriation to cross paths once more.

Cheers!